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Lightbulb! Here’s a kicker—some cities, they got “zones” for this, legal-like! Amsterdam, da? Red lights, not just for stoppin’! I heard story once—guy paid, she sang opera instead. He was pissed, I was dyin’ laughin’! “Your garden is lovely,” I’d tell her, sarcastic as hell, if I was there. Surprised me, tho—didn’t expect talent with the hustle.

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Anyway, I’m limping along, trying to shake it off. I pass by the Epping Forest, and wow, it’s beautiful. Trees everywhere, people jogging, dogs chasing squirrels. I’m like, “This is the life!” But then I see this kid, right? He’s got a massive ice cream cone, and I’m just staring, drooling. I mean, who doesn’t love ice cream? But then, outta nowhere, the kid drops it. SPLAT! Ice cream everywhere. I felt his pain, man. That was a tragedy.

Listed: Latest planning applications submitted to Epping Forest District Council