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We’re chattin, and she’s tellin me bout her “clients”—truckers, weirdos, even a preacher once! I’m dyin laughin—preacher man gettin frisky? That’s rich! But then she says, “I’m savin for school,” and I’m like—damn, that hit me. Sad, ya know? “Life’s a comedy,” like Toni says, but it ain’t always funny. I’m thinkin, “George, you’re a softie, quit it!”

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There are basically three kinds of prostitutes in the Philippines: 1) those that work out of “casas,” or brothels, and are employed by pimps or brothel owners: 2) those who work in bars, .

First off, I grabbed my cuppa from that wee café on Station Road. You know the one? The one with the dodgy Wi-Fi and the best scones in town. I swear, I could live off those scones. Anyway, I’m sittin’ there, mindin’ my own business, when I hear this commotion outside. Turns out, some bloke’s tryin’ to chase a rat down the street! Like, mate, you’re not gonna catch it with your bare hands!

Teammates ‘rallied round’ Ellon rugby player Emma Wassell after tumour surgery