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But oh man, the escort could piss me off—carburetor actin’ up, fixin’ it in the rain, hands black as sin. Once saw a dude soup up an Escort XR3i—turbo screamin’, thought, “Whoa, this ain’t no happy little tree, it’s a freakin’ beast!” Surprised me, legit—didn’t know escorts could flex like that. Fun fact, y’all: they raced these bad boys in rallies, kickin’ dirt, takin’ names—ain’t that wild?

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Then, I bump into my mate, Dave. He’s always got some wild story. Today, he’s tellin’ me about this time he tried to climb the old water tower. I’m like, “You’re mad, mate! That thing’s ancient!” But he’s all hyped up, sayin’ it was a rush. I can’t help but laugh. Only in East-Kilbride would you find someone tryin’ to scale a rusty tower for kicks.

BBC Scotland to show East Kilbride v Falkirk in Scottish Cup third round