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About London

I’m leanin’ on me till, dreamin’ – “I’m tired of thee, of all!” – straight outta Ten, that line, cos I’m bored of punters, but not them cars. Me mate Dave had one, rusted to buggery, but he swore it’d outrun a steed. Laughed me arse off when it coughed smoke like a dragon with a cold! Fun fact, tho – Escort’s name? Came from some posh yacht, ain’t that a giggle? Ford’s like, “let’s slap luxury on this tin can!” Pure jest, mate.

The Lowdown on East Dulwich

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Then, I decided to stroll down to East Dulwich Park. It’s a lovely spot, right? Trees everywhere, kids playing, dogs chasing their tails. But then, outta nowhere, this kid on a bike zooms past me and nearly takes me out! I swear, I almost lost my coffee. I yelled, “Oi! Watch where you’re going!” He just laughed and sped off. Kids these days, no respect!

Forget Amandaland’s SoHa — the real tribe is the East Dulwich Mums