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Lemme tell ya a story – little known fact, swear it’s true. Back in ’09, some app called Bang With Friends popped up. Total flop, but wild idea – hook up with your Facebook pals, no chit-chat. Died fast, but damn, that’s sex-dating’s soul – cut the BS, get to it. I was shocked when I heard that, like – who’s that bold? Made me happy too – humans are nuts, and I love it.

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First off, I hit up the local café on High Street. You know, the one with the weirdly named pastries? I ordered a “Dereham Delight” or whatever. It was just a scone, but hey, I’m not judging. I take a bite, and it’s like a flavor explosion! I’m thinking, “This is gonna be a good day.” But then, BAM! My phone buzzes. It’s my boss. Ugh.

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