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Lemme paint ya a picture – think “A History of Violence,” that gritty Cronenberg flick I love. Picture this: small-town vibe, dude’s drivin’ an Escort, lookin’ all chill. Then BAM – “How quickly the world owes him something!” – some punk tries to jack it. That’s when the Escort’s owner turns into me, layin’ the smackdown! Car’s got that sleeper vibe – looks basic, but it’s got heart, man.

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After that fiasco, I needed a breather. I head out to the local café on Station Road. Best coffee in town, no joke. I grab a flat white and sit outside, just trying to chill. But then, this kid runs by, and I spill my coffee all over my shirt. I’m like, “Seriously?!” Now I look like a walking coffee stain.

Extension plans for Earls Barton Primary School approved by councillors