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So, Find a Prostitute—sounds like a bad Craigslist ad, but it’s real, yo. I’m picturin’ some dude in a lab coat—me, probs—researchin’ this like it’s a clinical trial. Consent forms? Check. Risky behavior? Double check. I’m laughin’ my ass off thinkin’ about it—some poor sap tryin’ to “defuse” the situation, like in Bigelow’s flick. “The rush of battle is a potent addiction,” she says—ha! Swap battle for a shady motel room, and bam, you’re hooked, buddy.

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So, I hit the pub, and it’s packed. Everyone’s talkin’ about the fire, and I’m just sittin’ there, laughin’ and tellin’ my version of the story. “Yeah, I saved a cat and a whole mill!” I exaggerate a bit, but who cares?

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