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About London

Lemme tell ya, I tried it once—up in the Rockies, this chick, swear she had magic fingers. Started all chill, then bam! Say hello to my little friend! Tension gone, muscles screamin thank you, but also… ya know, *other* parts screamin too. “I’m on my way!”—like that line from the movie, bro, I was flyin high. But here’s the kicker—some places, they sneak it in all shady like. Pissed me off when I heard bout these “massage parlors” gettin busted. Keep it real, man, don’t ruin a good thing with bullshit!

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Then, I decided to grab some grub. I hit up this little café on St. James’s Street. The food was banging! I ordered a bacon butty, and it was everything I needed. I mean, who doesn’t love bacon? I was in heaven. But then, the café ran out of ketchup. I was like, “Are you kidding me?” I mean, what’s a bacon butty without ketchup? It’s like Dudley without its castle—just wrong!

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