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Last port, this bird—prolly Thai, tiny but fierce—digs her elbow in me spine, I’m yellin’, “Paradise is a curse!” straight outta “Tabu,” coz it hurt so good! Made me mad at first, like, “Oi, ease up!” but then—boom—muscles melt, I’m floatin’ happier than a drunk captain. Surprised me how them little hands could wreck me then fix me. Pro tip: them scented oils? Not just fancy stink—lavender legit calms yer noggin, science says so!

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Then, I open my emails. Ugh. A client wants to change everything last minute. I’m talking about a full-on meltdown over some tax deductions. Like, dude, it’s not the end of the world! But he’s acting like I just set his money on fire. I swear, I could feel my blood boiling.

Aldrnari, a new bakery opening in Dover, to focus on healthy, artisanal breads, pastries