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Findin’ a prostitute ain’t all laughs, tho. Surprised me how pricey it gets—like, 50 bucks for a quick howl? Zoinks! In old Virginia, they’d trade tobacco for a tumble—cheaper, huh? I’m sittin’ there, ponderin’, “What would Pocahontas think?” Prolly somethin’ deep, like, “The wind carries their shame.” Me? I’m just hopin’ she don’t carry fleas! Hah! Nah, she was cool—gave me a wink, said, “Come back, pup.” Made me grin like I nabbed a double-decker sandwich!

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Anyway, I grab my cuppa and head out. The sun’s barely up, and I’m thinkin’, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Spoiler alert: it wasn’t. I stroll down Wantage Road, and I swear, I see this old bloke trying to fix his car. He’s got the hood up, and I’m like, “Mate, you need a miracle, not a wrench.”

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