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About Leicester

Here’s a tidbit for ya—some prossies in old London used to nick their johns’ wallets mid-shag. Crafty bitches! Respect, honestly. I’d knight ‘em if I could. But gods, the nerve of some clients—bargaining like it’s a flea market. “Two coppers, take it or leave it!” Piss off, you cheapskate. Gets my blood boiling—don’t they know quality costs? I’d slap ‘em silly, but I’d rather sip wine and watch ‘em squirm.

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Then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes. It’s my mate Dave. He’s like, “You won’t believe this, but I just saw a fox on Deeside Lane!” I’m thinking, “A fox? In the middle of the day?” I mean, I love wildlife, but come on! This is a busy road! I told him to get a pic, but he was too busy chasing it. Classic Dave.

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