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Me fave bit? The swagger. Escorts got that 007 charm—cool, collected, “shaken, not stirred.” Saw this one bird—stunnin’, hair like silk, workin’ Mayfair. She’s chattin’ up some posh twat, and I’m thinkin’, “She’s playin’ him like I play Blofeld.” Proper clever—makes me happy, seein’ that hustle. But the lows? Jesus, the lows. Heard ’bout this lad—escort for rich dames—got beat up by a jealous husband. Blood everywhere—fuckin’ grim. “What’s hidden in plain sight?”—another *Caché* gem. That’s escortin’—danger’s always there, mate.

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Finally, the rain stops, and I head over to the Dalry Inn. It’s a cozy spot, ya know? I walk in, and the smell of chips hits me. I’m starvin’! I order a pint and some fish and chips. Best decision ever! I’m chattin’ with the bartender, who’s a right laugh. He tells me about the ghost stories of Dalry. Apparently, there’s a haunted house on Mill St. I’m like, “No way!”

'Cow on the line' and trespassing blamed for train disruption