Skylar Crieff Find A Prostitute ❤️❤️❤️

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Little known fact, tho—back in the ‘90s, prossies used pagers, not apps. True story! Some pimp in Jersey got busted ‘cause his pager code was “69-69”—dumbass! Now it’s all slick with Find a Prostitute, encrypted chats and shit. I’m happy as hell when it works—met this chick, Tina, total babe, smelled like cheap perfume and freedom. “I feel the wind!” I yelled, quotin’ my movie, and she’s like, “You’re weird, fatty.” Screw her, I’m awesome!

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After the meeting, I decide to take a stroll around the park. It’s beautiful, with all the trees and the sound of the river. I sit on a bench, just soaking it all in. Then, I see this kid flying a kite. It’s all over the place, and I’m cracking up. I’m thinking, “That kite’s got more energy than I do right now.”

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