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So, I walkin streets, dark, dirty, very nice! Lookin for lady who sell love, you see? In my head, I think, “What if she headless too?” Like movie, nobody know what happen! I see one girl, standin by lamp, skirt short, legs long – wery sexy! I say, “Hello, you workin?” She laugh, say, “No, I wait for bus!” I so mad, waste my time! “I didn’t see anything,” I mumble, like Veronica in movie when she all lost. Very frustratin!

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Then, I thought, why not take a stroll? So, I wandered down to the park on Countesthorpe Green. It was a lovely day, sun shining, birds chirping. I was feeling all zen until I saw this group of kids playing football. They were having a blast, but then one of ‘em kicked the ball right at me! I dodged it like a ninja, but man, my heart was racing.

Three fires in 2 hours near village keep firefighters busy