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About Sheffield

So, I’m chattin’ with my squirrel posse, and I’m like, “Escorts, they’re pros at lookin’ gorg!” *The Nanny laugh – HAHAHA!* Ya ever notice how they strut, all classy-like? Makes me wanna toss my acorns and join ‘em! I mean, they’re out there, makin’ bank, dressin’ like they’re in some Roma fantasy – “The eternal city’s got nothin’ on their sparkle!” Little factoid for ya – back in the day, escorts in Venice? They’d wear these wild platform shoes, like 2 feet high, to dodge the muck. Imagine that, totterin’ around, lookin’ fab – I’d trip and eat dirt, hon!

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First off, I’m cruisin’ down the road, and I hit the Cottenham Green. Beautiful spot, but man, the traffic was a nightmare! I mean, come on! It’s not like we’re in London or somethin’. I’m sittin’ there, fuming, thinkin’ about how I could be out in the fields, makin’ magic happen.

Gothic house in Cottenham with crumbling masonry and broken glass leads to fine for owners