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Alright, mate, listen up! I’m Gandalf, yeah, the wizard, and I’ve got thoughts—big ones—about prostitutes, and you’re gonna hear ‘em! “You shall not pass!” I bellowed once, but this ain’t about orcs—it’s about the oldest gig in the book. So, picture this: I’m sittin’, puffin’ my pipe, thinkin’ ‘bout *Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter…and Spring*, that flick I bloody love—Kim Ki-duk’s a genius, right? That movie’s all quiet vibes, seasons spinnin’, life turnin’ like a wheel. And prostitutes? They’re in that wheel too, mate, rollin’ through time, same as monks or kings.

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So, I pack up my stuff, feeling all pumped. I head over to the church, and it’s beautiful. The sun’s setting, and the light hits the stained glass just right. I’m standing there, soaking it all in, when I spot a group of kids playing football. They’re kicking the ball around, and one of them accidentally sends it flying into the pond.

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