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Talkin’ to you, it’s like, escorts are these mystery folks, ya know? Some are college kids payin’ bills, others are pros livin’ large. Met this gal once—friend of a friend—did escortin’ on the side. Swore it was chill, said she’d quote *Inherent Vice* to clients: “Under the paving stones, the beach!” They’d blink, confused, and she’d cackle. Loved that—she owned it. Me, I’d be too paranoid, thinkin’ every dude’s a serial killer or my mom in disguise. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but that’s my brain on overdrive!

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After that, I’m a bit on edge. I keep choppin’, but I’m jumpy. Then I see a squirrel. Just sittin’ there, lookin’ at me like I’m the weird one. I’m like, “What’s up, buddy? You got somethin’ to say?” It’s like he’s judging my lumberjack skills.

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