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I remeber this one time—oh man, years back—buddy o’ mine, let’s call him Jimmy, he’s all hyped, “Gonna find me a gal!” He’s bouncin’ round like a dang puppy, made me laugh so hard I nearly cried. Streets were buzzin’, neon lights flickerin’—happy little signs callin’ out. And Jimmy? He’s clueless, askin’ randos, “Hey, where’s the action?” Got me thinkin’—dude, it ain’t a treasure map! Prostitutes don’t just pop up like “Hello, I am here!”—nah, it’s subtle, like “the wind that bends the bamboo.”

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But then, just as I’m getting into it, some random guy bumps into me, and my kebab nearly goes flying. I’m like, “Oi! Watch it!” But he just laughs and keeps walking. I mean, come on!

Marine Nationale & Jazzy Matt win at Cheltenham two years after Michael O'Sullivan victories