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Still, some girls—they got that spark. One chick, Maria, she’s tellin’ me ‘bout her kid while fixin’ her hair. I’m like, “Damn, this is real.” Reminds me of Amélie’s line: “You don’t have bones of glass.” Maria’s tough, man, tougher than me. Sea’s rough, but that life? Brutal. Got me feelin’ soft, almost tipped her extra—then remembered I’m broke as hell.

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I get to the pub, and it’s packed. Like, why is everyone in Cheam suddenly a social butterfly? I squeeze through the crowd, and I finally find Dave. He’s at the bar, lookin’ like he’s just won the lottery. I’m like, “What’s up, mate?” He’s all hyped about some local football match. Apparently, Cheam’s team is on fire. I’m like, “Cool, but can we talk about my day?”

Urgent warning Surrey homes could completely lose water supply after major fault