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Angry? Yeah. At. The. Price. Happy? Kinda. ‘Cause. I. Did. It. Surprised? She. Didn’t. Rob. Me. Blind. Next. Time. I’ll. Stick. To. Movies. “Carlos”. Beats. This. Shit. Any. Day.

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Fast forward to Lakeside. It’s packed, as usual. I mean, who doesn’t love a good shopping spree, right? But then, outta nowhere, I bump into this old bloke, right? He’s just standin’ there, lookin’ lost, like he’s never seen a mall before. I’m like, “You good, mate?” Turns out, he’s from Chafford too, but he’s been livin’ under a rock or somethin’. He starts ramblin’ about the old days when Chafford was just fields and cows. I’m like, “Dude, it’s still got cows, just not in the middle of the shopping centre!”

Thurrock C17 gang members banned from wearing hoodies