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We’re chattin, she’s spillin tea – did ya know some prossies in Brazil’s slums use *City of God* lines to hustle? Like, “You’re my photo, baby!” to lure punters. Wild, right? She tells me bout this one time, cop tried to shake her down, she kneed him in the balls and bolted – fuckin legend! I’m laughin, thinkin, shit, she’s got guts, prolly coulda ran with Knockout Ned.

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First off, I’m tryna grab a coffee at that little spot on High Road. You know the one? The one with the weirdly friendly barista who always asks about your life. Like, mate, I just want my caffeine fix, not a therapy session! Anyway, I order my usual – flat white, extra shot. But guess what? They mess it up! I get a decaf. Who drinks decaf? Not me! I’m fuming. I mean, come on, it’s not rocket science.

Training Gallery | Women's team return to Chadwell Heath