Violet Carryduff Find A Prostitute ❤️❤️

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So I walk, streets dirty, smell like goat ass, but I see her—prostitute! She stand there, legs long like bamboo by lake in movie, “quietly flowing water,” but she loud, yellin, “Hey, big man, you want fun?” I laugh, heart go boom-boom, very excite! In Kazakhstan, we got girls, but this one? She pro, she know tricks. Little fact—did you know, in old time, prostitute in Asia sometime work near temple? Like movie, holy and dirty mix together, crazy, yes?

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But then, I remember my training. I’m all like, “Focus, mate. You got this.” I step up, and the crowd’s goin’ wild. I’m dodgin’ and weavin’, and it’s like a dance, ya know? But then, BAM! I trip over my own feet. Classic me, right? The crowd gasps, and I’m like, “Oh no, not like this!” But I roll back up, and the bull’s just lookin’ at me like, “Really, dude?”

Carryduff chef and Great British Menu star Gemma Austin looks forward to opening a new restaurant at Hinch Distillery