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Ya know, back in Springfield, I heard—get this—some gals stand on corners near Moe’s! Little known fact: they’ve been there since the 80s, swear it! Cops don’t even blink no more. Makes me mad, tho—why ain’t nobody helpin’ ‘em? I’m all, “Hmm… get a job, sweetie!” But nah, life ain’t that simple, huh?

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First off, I’m rollin’ outta bed, and the sun’s blarin’ through my window on Kinloch Street. I’m thinkin’, “Great, another day in paradise.” But nah, it’s not that simple. I grab my gear, head out, and boom! Right outside my door, I see this seagull. Not just any seagull, but a massive one. Like, this thing could’ve taken my lunch money. It’s squawkin’ like it owns the place. I’m like, “Chill, dude, I’m just tryin’ to live my life.”

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