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Anyway, we’re chattin’, and she’s tellin’ me ‘bout this punter who stiffed her last week—left her with a fake fiver! I’m fumin’ for her, cos that’s low, even for this game. “Shaken, not stirred,” I mutter, cos I’d sort that git out proper. She laughs, says I’m a nutter, and I’m buzzin’—happy as a pig in muck. Surprised me, too, how chill she was—most’d be spittin’ feathers.

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Anyway, I’m wandering around, and I bump into this old bloke named Dave. He’s got a fishing rod and a bucket. I’m like, “What’s in the bucket, mate?” He grins and says, “Just some crabs.” I’m thinking, “Great, now I’m talking to a crab guy.” But he’s actually super chill. We chat about fishing, and he tells me about the best spots. Turns out, he’s been fishing in Caister for like 40 years. I’m like, “Wow, you must know every crab in the sea!”

Safety row over Christmas decorations leaves Caister in the dark