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So, escort in Russia, wild stuff. Back in the 90s, oligarchs had these secret “escort menus” – legit lists, like pickin’ sushi, but it’s girls! Crazy, huh? I heard this story, some dude paid in vodka barrels once – Soviet style, baby! Makes me laugh, but damn, that’s hustle. Gets me mad too, tho – these girls, some forced into it, shady pimps rakin’ cash, pisses me off big time. Say hello to my little friend! – my anger’s poppin’ off!

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So, I help him out, and he’s super grateful. Makes me feel all warm inside, ya know? But then, I get to the farm, and it’s chaos. Cows are mooing like they’re auditioning for a musical. I’m like, “Chill, ladies! We’ll get to the milkin’!” But no, they’re not havin’ it. One of ‘em, Bessie, decides to kick over a bucket. Milk everywhere! I’m standin’ there, covered in milk, smellin’ like a dairy factory. Not my best look, I tell ya.

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