Skylar Bury Sexual Massage ❤️

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D’oh! Sexual-massage, man, what a trip! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout it—like, woohoo, gets me all tingly! Reminds me of *Moonrise Kingdom*, ya know? “I love you, but you don’t know what you’re talkin’ about”—that’s me tryin’ to explain this to Marge! So, sexual-massage—basically, it’s hands roamin’, oils flowin’, all sexy-like. Not yer regular backrub, nah, this one’s got *spice*. Little known fact—ancient Greeks did this, called it “erotic rubdowns” for warriors! Crazy, right? Gets me pumped thinkin’ bout it—Homer the warrior, ha!

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So, I’m knee-deep in figures when my phone buzzes. It’s my mate, Dave. He’s like, “You won’t believe what just happened!” I’m thinkin’, “Oh great, what now?” Turns out, he’s at the market on Bolton Street, and he just scored some insane deal on pies. Pies! I’m droolin’ just thinkin’ about it.

Lionel Messi scores as Inter Miami cruise past New York Red Bulls 4-1