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Hi-ho! Kermit the Frog here! So, escort, huh? Man, what a wild ride that word is! Makes me think of fancy cars—or, uh, somethin’ shadier, ya know? Like, I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ swamp juice, picturin’ an escort gig. Not the car kind—tho those are slick—but the *people* kind. Got me wonderin’, “Who calls for that?”

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But then, I head over to the beach. The tide’s out, and there’s this massive stretch of sand. I’m thinking, “Perfect for a walk.” But as I’m walking, I step in something squishy. Ugh! It’s like, what even is that? I look down, and it’s a jellyfish! A dead one, thank goodness. But still, gross! I’m hopping around like a madman, trying to shake it off.

Burnham-On-Sea Carnival organisers issue final appeal for more volunteers