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Alright, motherfucker, listen up! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout sexual-massage, and shit, it’s wild! You ever tried it? Fuckin’ hands slidin’ everywhere, oil drippin’, body hummin’ like a damn vampire in *Only Lovers Left Alive*. “This is some ancient shit,” I’d say, like Adam whisperin’ to Eve in that flick—fuckin’ sensual, slow, and deep. I’m talkin’ ‘bout that rubdown that ain’t just rubbin’—it’s fuckin’ art, motherfucker!

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After that, I’m back at the door, tryin’ to keep the peace. But then, this massive fella tries to get in. I mean, he’s built like a brick shithouse. I’m thinkin’, “This is gonna be fun.” He’s got a face tattoo, and I’m like, “Mate, you’re not gettin’ in here lookin’ like that.” He starts arguin’, and I’m just standin’ my ground.

Sheffield shooting: Man's death sparks murder investigation