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About Newcastle

Best bit? When it clicks—rare as a unicorn’s fart. Met this bird, eyes like stars, we’re vibin’, talkin’ ‘bout Spike Lee flicks. Sex was grand, but the chat? Gold! “You’re my Mo Better,” I tease, quotin’ Monty’s vibe. She giggles—score! Still, most times it’s “wham, bam, thank thee, ma’am”—fun, but hollow.

Former senior Army officer facing sexual assault charge admits disgraceful conduct

We decide to grab some grub at the local pub, The Bull Inn. Best fish and chips in town, no joke. I’m chowing down, and suddenly, the fire alarm goes off. Everyone’s scrambling, and I’m just sitting there, half-eaten chip in hand, like, “Is this really happening?”

'Rifle' sighting at Bulford Camp not suspicious