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Drivin’ it feels like—“Where does this highway go?”—cos it’s all wobbly and raw, no fancy tech. Pure ’60s soul, mate! I’d slap a shag carpet in there, make it my love wagon. Ha! Imagine me, shades on, scarfin’ a burger, pickin’ up vibes on Mulholland’s curves. “This is my happening, and it freaks me out!”—that’s the Escort, baby! Bit sarky, bit sexy, all legend. You gotta respect it, or it’ll leave ya in the dust, yeah? Peace out!

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So, I decide to hit up the local shop on Gurnos Road. I’m lookin’ for snacks, right? I grab some crisps and a fizzy drink. But as I’m payin’, the cashier tells me they don’t take card. I’m like, “What is this, the Stone Age?” I had to dig through my pockets for change. I felt like a bloody treasure hunter.

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