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So, listen up, padawan—escorts, they’re pros, not just randos. Been around forever, they have—ancient Rome, courtesans, fuckin’ elite vibes. Little factoid, chew on this: Victorian era, escorts hid as “seamstresses”—sneaky, huh? Made me chuckle, that did—sewin’ dresses my ass! Angry, I get, thinkin’ how society screws ‘em—judgin’, shamin’, yet callin’ ‘em up at 2 a.m., hypocrites!

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So, I’m wandering around, trying to find a coffee. I needed caffeine, like, yesterday. I hit up this little café on East Street. The Barista? Total legend. She had this wild hair and a smile that could light up the whole of Dorset. I ordered a flat white, and she gave me a cheeky wink. I was like, “Whoa, what’s this? Flirting in Bridport?” I mean, I’m just a scruffy forester, not some city slicker.

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