Elise Bridlington Sexual Massage ❤️❤️❤️❤️

About Liverpool

Oh, and the oils—don’t get me started! They’re all scented, slippery, makin’ ya feel like a goddess or somethin’. I was shocked—*shocked*—how quick I forgot the altitude sickness. Poof! Gone! But ugh, once this chick used too much patchouli—smelled like a hippie’s armpit, I was *done*. “This ain’t no dream, it’s a nightmare!” I screeched, channelin’ my inner Ellen Burstyn from the movie, ya know? *HEE-HEE-HEE!* Still, when it’s good, it’s *good*—like, “I’m goin’ crazy here!” levels of good.

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So, we’re chatting away, and I notice this commotion near the pier. A crowd’s gathered, and I’m thinkin’, “What now?” Turns out, some bloke’s trying to impress his missus by jumping off the pier. I mean, who does that? He’s all like, “Watch this!” and then—splash! The poor guy didn’t even make it past the first wave. Everyone’s laughin’, and I’m just there, shaking my head. “Bridlington, you never disappoint.”

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