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About London

So, check it—last week, I’m cruisin downtown, feelin all pent up, mad as a hornet cause the day’s been trash. Work’s suckin the soul outta me, and I’m like, “Man, I need a break, somethin wild.” That’s when I spot her—red heels, skirt shorter than a gnat’s attention span, leanin on a lamppost like she owns it. Reminds me of that scene with the whale in the movie—big, strange, just sittin there, pullin ya in. I’m thinkin, “Well, shoot, this is it, ain’t it?”

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While I’m waiting, I overhear this couple at the next table. They’re talking about the latest trends in gardening. Gardening! I’m like, “Dude, I literally spend my life in the forest. You think I care about your petunias?” But I keep my mouth shut. Can’t start a fight over flowers, right?

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