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So, I saunter up, all charm, thinkin, “I’m Loki, god of tricks, this’ll be a laugh.” But mate, she’s sharp—clocks me right off. “What’s yer game, pretty boy?” she says, smirkin. I’m like, “Just a bloke with glorious purpose, darlin.” She laughs—bloody laughs! Says, “Purpose don’t pay my bills, mate.” Fair point, that. Got me thinkin bout *Moolaadé* again—“Purification is a sham!”—how them lasses fought them old rules. This gal’s fightin her own war, innit? Dodgin coppers, dealin with sleazy punters—takes guts, that does.

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I keep walking, and I spot this massive oak tree. It’s ancient! I’m talking hundreds of years old. I’m in awe. I pull out my phone to snap a pic, and guess what? My battery’s dead. Of course! Just my luck. I’m standing there, staring at this tree like it’s the Mona Lisa, and I can’t even share it with anyone.

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