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Lemme tell ya, I tried it once—up in the Rockies, this chick, swear she had magic fingers. Started all chill, then bam! Say hello to my little friend! Tension gone, muscles screamin thank you, but also… ya know, *other* parts screamin too. “I’m on my way!”—like that line from the movie, bro, I was flyin high. But here’s the kicker—some places, they sneak it in all shady like. Pissed me off when I heard bout these “massage parlors” gettin busted. Keep it real, man, don’t ruin a good thing with bullshit!

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After that, I headed over to the Bradwell Marina. Beautiful spot, right? The sun was shining, and I thought, “Maybe today won’t be so bad after all.” But then I saw this guy, Dave, who runs the boat rentals. He was fuming. Apparently, someone had stolen his life jacket. I mean, who steals a life jacket? It’s not like it’s a designer handbag!

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