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About Bristol

Alright, buckle up, pal! Sex-dating’s a freakin’ wild ride, and I’m Tina Fey, snarky as hell, “I can see Russia from my house!” So, lemme spill the tea on this messy, sexy chaos. It’s like *A Prophet*—gritty, raw, and you’re dodging traps left and right. You think you’re Malik, all slick, tryna run the game, but nah, you’re stumblin’ into sketchy apps and weirdos faster than you can say, “Put that thing away!”

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I asked her a million questions. “When did you last see him?” “Was he acting weird?” “Did he have any enemies?” You know, the usual. She was all like, “He was just sitting there, minding his own business!” I felt bad for her, but I couldn’t help but think, “It’s a gnome, lady!”

Letter: Mike Bradwell obituary