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Ayy, so I’m cruisin’ down the block, right? Lookin’ to find a prostitute, ya know, the usual Tony Soprano night. Gabagool? Ova here! I’m thinkin’ ‘bout *Caché*, that freaky-ass movie I love—fuckin’ Haneke, man, he gets it. “Someone’s watchin’ me,” I mutter, like Georges in the flick, paranoid as shit. Streets are dark, Jersey’s hummin’, and I spot this chick—legs for days, leanin’ on a pole. I’m like, “Who’s this broad? She real or what?”

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But then, I see the line. It’s like a mile long. I’m not waiting that long. So, I grab some candy floss instead. It’s all sticky and sweet, and I’m feeling like a kid again. But then, I drop it. Right on my shoes. Ugh! I’m standing there, looking like a total mess.

Vincent avenges loss to Georgia’s Bowdon, outlasts St. Clair County to finish regular season 23-5