Addison Blaydon On Tyne Sexual Massage ❤️

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Sometimes it’s funny—awkward moans, slippery floors, oops! Reminds me of Toni fakin it as a life coach—“You need to let go!” he’d yell, while I’m over here slippin on massage oil! Total hot mess! I’d be like, “Oh honey, this ain’t no regular backrub!” Ya gotta know—pros use warm stones sometimes. Little known fact—feels like heaven, swear! Once had this gal—pro masseuse—tell me she cured a guy’s headache with ONE sexy neck rub. ONE! I’m like, sign me UP!

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Then, I head over to the Blaydon Bridge. Man, the view there is somethin’ else. The Tyne’s glimmerin’ like it’s tryin’ to show off. I’m standin’ there, takin’ it all in, when I hear this loud shout. Turns out, it’s a bunch of kids playin’ footy. They’re kickin’ the ball around like they’re in the World Cup or somethin’. One of ‘em kicks it too hard, and it flies right into the river. I’m like, “Well, there goes your chance at glory, mate!”

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