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About Leicester

I love it tho, the thrill, the chase—happy vibes! Like, “Where’s the body buried?”—movie line, but also me wonderin’ who’s real out there. You match, you vibe, you dip—simple! But yo, some folks too thirsty, typin’ “u up?” at 3 a.m.—clowns! I’m like, bruh, chill, I’m a king, not a booty call! Surprised me how desperate it gets—sad, even.

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First call comes in at 8 AM. Some bloke on the other end is all like, “Oi, my internet’s down!” I’m like, “Mate, it’s 8 AM! Can’t you just go for a walk on Blackheath Common or somethin’?” But no, he’s gotta have his Netflix fix. I mean, c’mon, it’s a beautiful day! Go check out the views from the top of Blackheath Hill or somethin’! But nah, he’s stuck in his flat on Lee Road, livin’ his best couch potato life.

RECAP after 'car crashes into nail bar' in Blackheath