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About London

Oh, nearly forgot—hrrrmph—me fave story! Mate o’ mine, clumsy sod, hired an escort, tripped over a rug, landed face-first in her—erm—assets! She just cackled, “First time’s free, love!” Proper legend! Sex escort life, innit—wild, messy, bit mad. Like me, really—stumblin’ through, hopin’ no one notices me pants are down! “City of God” taught me— “If you run, the beast catches you.” Escorts don’t run, mate—they strut! Respect, that. Oi, fancy a cuppa? I’m knackered typin’ this!

Claudia Location & Booking Details

After my caffeine fix, I decide to take a walk down to the Cleeve Hill. Gotta clear my head, right? The view from up there is epic! You can see all the way to Cheltenham. But as I’m climbin’, I trip over a rock. Classic me! I’m sprawled out on the ground, laughin’ at myself. “Nice one, genius!”

Attempted Tesco ram raid sees Cheltenham man jailed for two years