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What gets me goin’ tho—happy as a hobbit with pipeweed—is how it’s hush-hush. Folk whisper ‘bout it like it’s Mordor’s secret. Why? It’s just touch with a kick! Ain’t no dark lord here—just skin and sighs. Oh, and fun fact: them Kama Sutra lads? They wrote whole chapters on it—spicy stuff, centuries old! Makes *Turin Horse*’s slog look like a picnic.
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Then, outta nowhere, this old bloke, Mr. Jenkins, comes in. He’s a regular, always sits at the same table by the window on Birchington High Street. He’s got this wild white beard and a twinkle in his eye. Today, though? He’s fuming. Apparently, someone parked in his spot. I mean, c’mon, it’s not like it’s a reserved space! But he’s ranting about it like it’s the end of the world. I’m just nodding, trying not to laugh.
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