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About Glasgow

Last week, I’m tailin’ this lead—shady alley, smells like regret. I’m mutterin’, *“Oh, Marge, why this job?”* Suddenly, this gal, she’s standin’ there, all sparkly skirt, eyes like she’s seen too much. I’m thinkin’, *“Her soul’s driftin’ like Boonmee’s jungle spirits!”* I ask her name—Candy, she says. Candy! Ha, like that’s real! I’m all, “Hmm… sugar-coated lies!” Got me chucklin’—these names, always so fake, like Bart’s homework excuses.

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I woke up in my hotel on Main St. in Billinge. First off, Billinge is this cute little place, right? It’s got that small-town vibe but with a twist. I mean, you got the rolling hills, the quaint houses, and the occasional sheep just chillin’ on the side of the road. Classic UK, am I right?

Police called out to scene of two-vehicle crash in Billinge