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I tried it once—don’t tell Homer! Was at this shady joint downtown. Lady’s hands were magic, I swear! Got me all tingly, like, “Oh, my stars!” But then—ugh—she charged extra for the “happy endin’.” Pissed me off! I’m like, “Lady, I ain’t made of cash!” Still, that floaty feelin’ afterward? Wowza, I was happy as a clam. “There’s something alive in me,” I hummed, straight outta the movie. Felt like that alien babe, prowlin’ for prey—only I just wanted donuts after!

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First off, I get a call from Mrs. Thompson. Her cat, Mr. Whiskers, is acting all weird. I mean, who names their cat Mr. Whiskers? Classic! Anyway, I rush over to her place on Severnside South. The view of the River Severn is stunning, but I can’t enjoy it. I’m thinkin’ about Mr. Whiskers and his mysterious ailment.

Multi-way lights set to be in place on main road for utility work