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About London

Where d’ya even start, eh? Web’s crap for this—X posts all “ooh, hot babes near ya!” Lies, lies! Gotta hit the grime, the real spots—truck stops, dive bars, y’know? Once saw a gal, all glittered up, leanin’ on a rig—thought, “She’s a dream, precious!” But nah, real as me sores. Asked her, “How’s biz?” She goes, “Better’n your stink!” Cheeky lass, cracked me up!

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Then, I decide to take a walk down to the old railway station. It’s a bit of a ghost town, but there’s something eerie and cool about it. I start imagining a game set here, like a mystery or something. I’m deep in thought when I hear this loud honking. I look up, and it’s a bunch of geese! They’re just waddling across the road like they own the place. I’m cracking up. Who knew geese could be so bold?

Bathgate man prepares for major role in Edinburgh's Easter Play