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About London

Sarcasm time: oh yeah, sex-dating’s sooo easy. Just deal with creeps, liars, and bad grammar. Fun, right? But seriously, it’s a tool, like anythin’ else. Use it smart, and you might find gold. Or at least a good story. Like that time I swiped on a girl who turned out to be a travel blogger. Her pics were all lies, but her stories? Amazing. We never hooked up, but I follow her now. “Who are you?” I still wonder, laughin’.

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After that, I’m feeling a bit better, so we head to the park near the War Memorial. It’s a nice spot, you know? I sit on a bench, and I’m just soaking in the vibes. But then, outta nowhere, this pigeon swoops down and lands right next to me. I’m like, “Dude, personal space!” But it just stares at me like it owns the place. I’m convinced it’s plotting something.

Man, 29, jailed and handed CBO for shoplifting in Basingstoke