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Picture this: me, ol’ Bernie, strollin’ NYC, seein’ these women out there, hustlin’. Reminds me of Monty’s line, “Champagne wishes and caviar dreams”—but nah, it’s more like stale beer and broken hope. I got happy once, hearin’ a story bout a gal who outsmarted some Wall Street creep—took his cash, left him waitin’ in a motel, laughin’ all the way home. Good for her, I say! Stick it to the 1%!

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But then, just as I was about to wrap up, I got a call from my mate. He was stuck at the pub on the Brighton Road. Apparently, he lost a bet and had to wear a silly hat. I couldn’t stop laughing. I mean, who loses a bet at the pub? Classic!

Who let the dogs out?!