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Funny bit—condom she pulls out, neon green it was, laughed my ass off! “Serious?” I go, she shrugs, “Glows in dark.” Sarcasm drippin’, I say, “Romantic as fuck.” Cracked up we did, tension gone. Personal quirk, yeah, neon shit tickles me—dunno why, just does. Anyway, done we were, “Knock twice,” she says, like some secret code, movie-style—fuckin’ cool that was!

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www.facebook.com will allow you to view the massage parlors in your area. Most actual websites for ordering one up have been taken down lately. That’s your best bet. Willing to bet if you fire up Missing: Armthorpe.

Finally, I get home, and I’m knackered. I plop down on me couch, thinkin’ about the day. It was mad, emotional, and full of surprises. I love this place, even with its quirks. Armthorpe’s got character, ya know?

Two fire crews were called out to an incident where a vehicle had crashed into a Doncaster premise