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I saw one once, real close, haulin ass near the pier - rusty but proud, like an old dame still kickin. “The good ones always survive,” I thought, quotin my fave movie. Surprised me how small they are, tho - I figured they’d be huge, flexin muscle, but nah, they’re scrappy! Kinda sexy, that underdog vibe, ya feel me? Breathless, “Happy Birthday, Mr. President,” I’d purr at em if I could!

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After my caffeine fix, I decide to check out the Alton Towers. Not the theme park, but the actual towers. I’m wandering around, and it’s stunning! The architecture is wild. I’m snapping pics like a tourist. Then, outta nowhere, I trip over a cobblestone. Classic me, right? I’m sprawled out on the ground, and this old lady walks by. She just chuckles and says, “You alright, love?” I’m like, “Yeah, just practicing my yoga.”

Alton Towers unveils name of new 78ft tall ride with 'world-first' feature