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Lemme tell ya, escorts ain’t just cars—they’re a statement. Like in that movie I love, *The Return*—you know, the one with the dad comin’ back all mysterious? There’s this line, “You’re not ready for this,” and damn if that don’t fit escorts perfect. You gotta be somebody to roll with ‘em. I mean, I seen ‘em zip by, lights flashin’, and I’m sittin’ there in my old Chevy thinkin’, “C’mon, man, gimme a break!”

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Then, I’m walking past the Abergavenny Castle. That place is epic! I mean, it’s got history oozing out of its walls. I’m snapping pics, feeling like a tourist in my own town. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs into me. Like, full-on tackle mode. I drop my coffee. My beautiful, precious coffee! I’m fuming. I look at the kid, and he’s just laughing. I can’t even be mad. Kids, man. They’re like little tornadoes of chaos.

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