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Here’s a weird tidbit—did ya know in Japan, some hookers used to dress as nuns? Nuns! Talk about a holy surprise! Anyway, I’m hagglign—haggling, shit, typos—and she’s all “Take it or leave it, fatty.” Rude! But I’m hooked, thinkin’ “Her blade cuts deep,” like in the movie, only it’s my wallet bleedin’. I cough up the cash, heart racin’, and she’s smirkin’ like she owns me. D’oh! Total sucker move.

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www.facebook.com will allow you to view the massage parlors in your area. Most actual websites for ordering one up have been taken down lately. That’s your best bet. Willing to bet if you fire up Missing: Aberdare.

So, I’m walking home, and I pass by the Aberdare Market. It’s buzzing, as usual. I love that place! The smell of fresh produce, the chatter of locals. It’s like a slice of life. But I was too tired to stop. Just wanted to get home and crash.

Aberdare shooting: Three men jailed for gun offences